Everything comes to an end, and the best things end even faster. It’s never easy to come back from a long trip and get back into the routine. However, this reality is even more difficult when this extraordinary journey has lasted for years. As much as returning to our country, our province or even our city, our neighbourhood can seem easy, natural; it is not so for everyone. This return to basics after a prolonged expatriation is what is known as reverse culture shock.
If the culture shock was at the end of our lips at the beginning of the adventure, when leaving Canada, it was surely softened by the excitement of this adventure, the desire to discover a new culture, to be tempted by the local gastronomy, and immerse ourselves in a new language or accent.
The reverse culture shock is simply explained by a "difficulty" in reintegrating into one's own country, one's own culture after some time spent abroad, but it should not be underestimated either. It is at the end of this adventure that this culture shock in our own country is often most difficult. We don't even think about this "difficulty". Since when is going back to our sources difficult? Yet, in reality, it can be more difficult than we might think.
Meeting new people, moving to a new country, traveling, and dealing with the new constantly with a bit of excitement and freedom can seem like a constant rush of adventure, the exciting reality of ex-pats. But, when the last months come before the end of this adventure, you face a realm of emotions. We feel constantly torn between enjoying the moments we have left and planning the return. Ignoring the end, or what is coming may seem like the best protection, but it is not the solution. Reverse culture shock, we will have to face it as much as we can feel ready, this shock will affect us, and preparing for it is the best defense to adopt.
Accepting the reality that when you return home, when this odyssey is about to end, reuniting with your old lands, friends and family and finally being able to share all those moments with them in person will be magical, but will also dissipate very quickly.
This is when this euphoria will melt away, when we will realize that nothing and no one has really changed around us ... but we did! that this will be the most difficult step to take. This is where returning to our country, our city will no longer seem so exciting, but rather dull, boring or even monotonous. We will miss the little everyday things that we loved to hate in our adopted country, we will feel lost at home. It can even be difficult for those close to us not to understand, to even make us feel guilty for not being happy to come back to OUR country.
Reverse culture shock is also the necessary transition to accept that we have to take the necessary time to readjust and finally see the positive sides of finally being back in the fold.
Losing the ex-pat label that made us different no matter which company we ended up with is not the end of the world; it’s just an opportunity to anchor yourself, to finally be able to answer the question: where are you from? Now is the time to rediscover our home, because it is exciting to travel, but it is also good to come back home!
- Iga Jurek
Information and Resource Programs Coordinator
Military Family Services (Europe)